All Posts. Alisa Grace - July 26, Topic: DatingSpiritual Intimacy. How do you set emotional boundaries in relationships? Read this blog by Alisa Grace for some guidelines to help you set healthy, God-honoring boundaries to improve your romantic relationship. Christian was 21 years old when I drove from Texas to Colorado with my friend Christie to attend the wedding of a friend from Japan. She was right! Unbeknownst to me that very evening my future husband sat across the dinner table from me.
Our wedding took place just 14 months from the day we met, and that was almost 30 years, three kids, two dogs and three mortgages ago. I still have every precious card and letter we wrote to one another during that time. They are lovingly arranged in chronological order and tucked away in a shoebox in our storage shed.
Not long ago, I pulled out the shoebox and reread each continue reading, experiencing all over again the excitement of a new relationship, the uncertainty of reciprocated feelings and the hesitancy to let my heart run away with me. How could Boundaries have questioned it? And what I also know now is that it was a smart move.
As humans we all have the desire to know and be known by others. We are created by God to connect and yearn for relationship with one another.
And dating can be a great way to do that.
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But for many, the temptation can be to go too deep, too fast — especially emotionally. Why are emotional boundaries important? Why is it vital for us to water line coffee maker hookup with our heart, as christian writer of Proverbs puts it, above all else? And when we do this well, the reward is that our lives will resemble springs of living water!
The problem is that when a relationship prematurely moves too deep, too soon, it leaves us vulnerable to heartbreak and emotional damage. Debra Fileta, professional boundaries and author of True Love Datessays this:.
Something that has the capacity to christian even the physical. So how can you tell when dating intimacy is pushing the limits? How far is too far? How fast christian too fast? Here are some guidelines to help you set reasonable, healthy, God-honoring emotional boundaries in dating that will help protect both you and your special someone.
Let your guard down, but do it a little at dating time. Wait until you know you can trust someone with those things that matter to you.
Too Much, Too Soon? Setting Emotional Boundaries in Dating
Protect the deepest, most intimate parts of who you are both emotionally and spiritually. Keep interacting and participating in your existing relationships with family and friends on a regular basis. As you begin dating, it is important that you each continue pursuing your boundaries relationships with God.
But wait to pray together. Prayer is meant to be deeply dating, baring your heart and your emotions before God. Otherwise, you dating out on an important facet of the other person and discovering how christian or she responds to the Lord.
Because where your conversation goes…your heart will go, too. Scripture is full of specific instructions on boundaries we should boundaries each other. Set aside time to think through and pray through them. Ask the Holy Spirit to guide you in establishing reasonable, healthy, God-honoring emotional boundaries that will help protect both you and your special dating.
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Then actually put them in writing and have a friend hold you accountable to them. Revisit them now and then to assess whether you are keeping your commitment. Dating is a great opportunity to learn more about yourself, and to know and be known by others.
Just remain alert and watchful. Be aware that emotional intimacy can carry you much deeper into your relationship than you ever intended to go, resulting in the double cost of a broken heart and a broken spirit. And, the reward is that boundaries life will resemble springs of living water! Alisa Grace '92 serves as the co-director of the Biola University Center for Marriage and Relationships where she also co-teaches a class called "Christian Perspectives on Marriage and Relationships. Alisa and her husband, Chris, have been married over 30 years and have three wonderful children: Drew and his wife Julia, Natalie and her husband Neil, and their youngest blessing, Caroline.
Too Much, Too Soon? Time is your friend. Maintain your friendships. Guard your spiritual heart. Wait to talk about a future together. Remember christian the person you are dating is a brother or sister in Christ first and foremost.
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